I see so many posts of people REALLY needing help, but I dont see anyone getting any help from anyone. I see people replying and saying to go see a church or goodwill or something, things that we all already know, but no one is actually helping on this site I dont think. Church and Goodwill does not pay your rent. It doesnt give my baby his daddy back. It doesnt bring my husband back to life. I know nothing will, but you have NO IDEA how badly I want some of this stress to be gone just so I can properly grieve for the recent loss of my husband because I havent even had a chance to really cry for him because all I am ever doing is worrying and doing anything I can to try to support our baby and keep a roof over his head. We already lost the apartment, and living out of a hotel, but I only have a few more days to get 750$ together to pay for the hotel because you have to pay the full month in advance. Hotels do not have grace periods, if you dont pay, you dont have a room. And if you dont pay the monthly rate here, its extremely expensive.
And if no one on here is willing to help an infant have a place to live and have somne food and clean clothes that fit, until I start getting my paychecks, then I dont know who is getting help on here. Because if it was just me I wouldnt even be on this site. Im grown and I can handle whatever I need to handle. But one thing I cannot handle is my baby not having what he needs. No child should live like this.
There is some good news at least, but its potentially a devastating situation if I dont get this right. I got a really good job. It was supposed to start a couple weeks ago but it got delayed and now it just started. So thats a couple of weeks of pay that I thought I was going to have, and I would have had the money for the hotel if that would have happened. But of course it didnt, because for some reason all of a sudden anything bad that will happen IS happening. I have always had good luck and have always made things work, I dont know why this is all happening. Isnt losing my husband enough? Cant handle much more. And I dont even have an outlet for stress, I dont smoke or drink or do any drugs, never have.. so my only stress relief is taking care of my child, because that is my absolute favourite thing to do. No matter what it is, feeding him, putting him to bed, playing with him, even if he wakes up in the middle of the night crying, I happily wake up to take care of him.. i have not once been stressed out or upset with anything that has to do with taking care of him. I adore every second of it.
But anyways.. at least the job is starting. But I dont have the money to pay someone to watch him. I found someone that is really experienced and she gave me a copy of her background checks and everything, I called references, everything checked out PLUS shes cheap. But cheap isnt cheap enough when you dont have money. So if I cant pay her to watch him, I cant go to work, then I lose the job. I also need gas money to GET TO the job. So basically I need money for a sitter, gas money, I really dont care if I even eat right now so Im not too worried about that, I can eat bread or oatmeal or something, but the baby needs food because WIC will not just approve me for some reason, they keep asking for proof of income and I dont have proof of income and theyve been asking me for this even before I got the job and I keep telling them Im applying BECAUSE I dont have income, which means no proof. People, please stop messing with me. Let SOMETHING go right for once! My car keeps cutting out while Im driving so Im just praying every day that it will keep working and not break. ESPECIALLY if the baby is with me, it is so so so cold here, if we broke down somewhere at night in this cold, I have no idea what I would do. So no matter how broke we are right now, i make sure I have my cell phone paid because that is a safety issue for the baby. So at least I have a phone. Anyways, sitter, gas, food for baby, and the hotel rent coming up in a few days.
I dont care what we have to do to make you comfortable with helping,I am willing to do it. If you want to write up a contract saying I need to pay X amount back plus X amount interest by X amount of time, I would absolutely sign that. I would give copy of my ID and SS card, anything you need to know how to take me to court if I dont pay you back. Because I know that Im going to be able to pay for everything and have money left over as soon as I get just a couple checks, so paying money back is NO PROBLEM. AND I have a 6month contract on this job, so I wont be losing the job before I am able to pay you back in full.
I have no idea what situation someone has to be in to get help, if this isnt a desperate enough situation to reach someones heart out there that wants to be this babys angel. You have NO IDEA the difference you would make in this torn familys life. If someone actually did help, I know Im going to finally cry immediately because so much of this stress would be lifted off of my shoulders, I would know my baby was going to be ok, I would be able to stop worrying for one second and finally cry for my husbands loss of his life, and also cry because someone out there actually still has a heart. I know people on here give to charities.. I dont see why they wouldnt want to actually see the results of their help, to see it actually affect a childs life and actually see a family consider you as their life saving angel. Im not asking for anyone to feel bad for me losing my husband or not having what I need, but please PLEASE please dont overlook my child and just assume someone else will help or that we will figure it out because its not going to happen and this site is my last hope to just make it until I get my first paycheck. Thank you for reading all of this. I dont know what else to say.. except for please.
